I find it ironic that once I got serious about writing a memoir about bread&cup, the process has already begun to give something back to me. The dream that started to germinate as far back as 1994; the same dream that required all my creative energy and financial resources I could throw at it; the very dream that eventually got buried on December 10, 2017 has already begun showing signs of new life again.
Two weeks ago, I lost my job suddenly. Ten days ago, my mom had surgery to address unknown source of pain and discomfort in her abdomen. Six days ago, Karen entered the hospital with a mystery infection that is still undetermined. This is a lot to deal with in a short time.
As I was writing this week, I discovered the longest chapter in the book of bread&cup is the one titled Cancer. We came face to face with this enemy in May of 2010 and have been contending with it off and on now for nine years. It has sought to dominate our lives, but we have refused to allow it that much power.
If there is one thing I have learned through the difficulties I’ve experienced in my life, it is this primary thought: circumstances do not get a say in how I choose to believe. Try as they may, I can refuse how they attempt to define me. I’ve had to deal with the untimely deaths of loved ones. I’ve walked through business failure and bankruptcy, through cancer and disease, through loss after loss. Each crisis offers me a message, and the theme of that message is always negative. It has helped me to recognize their words and resist them before they ever take hold. Mine always begin with the word You.
- You’re such a failure.
- You have the worst luck.
- You didn’t plan properly.
- You’re screwed now.
- You need to stop dreaming and come back to reality.
Bad circumstances are inevitable. Everyone takes a bite out of the shit sandwich. Some more than others. Everyone will experience difficulty they do not want regardless of how much effort is exerted to stay in control.
All negative emotions and experiences are temporary. Sorrow is only for a season. Hardship is not forever. Grief comes to pass. It doesn’t come to stay. On the other hand, Joy is persistent. It always wants to find its way back home.
My circumstances and all their messages don’t get to define me. I won’t escape their effects, but can I refuse to believe their words.
Today I side with Hope. I like what it says to me. It tells me better days are always ahead.
I admire your resolve. I give far too much power to circumstance. Thanks for the insight.
I needed this message today. Thank you for writing it. Prayers for your wife and mother. <3
Very much needed these words.
Thank you
You and I both side with hope. Add in at least a cup of prayer, a dash of hugs, a pinch of a smile or two and you’ve got yourself a recipe for something good.
In addition to hope, I’m praying for you to also experience God’s promised peace that goes beyond anything we can understand and of course healing for Mom, Karen and your job situation.
Bless you and thank you! You may never know the lessons and memories you have provided for others. I will be praying for you, Karen and your mother.
You are amazing and blessed with God’s love and strength in you.
Blessings to you and your family.
Sometimes, it is hard to understand what God is doing, so I am thankful for your words of hope! God is using you in the middle of your stuff! Pls give my girl, Karen, a hug!
Wow Brother! Don’t know why you and I have experienced the journeys through life that we have. And very painfully. Yet I see as you do that while the storms of life somehow persist even still, the Lord’s promises to see us through to the other side are still true. None of this has caught God by surprise. I will continue to pray for you and yours. If we hang in with the Spirit of Galatians 6:9-10 and Roman’s 8:18 based on 1 Corinthians 1:18 – sooner than we think none of all of this will matter anymore and we will celebrate for all eternity what the Lord has done! Kevin it breaks my heart what you still endure Brother! Call me when you get a chance please so we can cry together and lift each other up. Stay strong sir as trite as that sounds! I love you Brother and appreciate you!